by jason - December 19, 2004

Not having had much of an opportunity to play the original Goldeneye, or many of the Bond games in general, one may wonder how I ended up reviewing the current "Bond" game, Goldeneye: Rogue Agent. Suffice it to say, it probably wasn't for my Bond experience, which likely gives me a... unique, likely unbiased... perspective on the game.

*Yawn* What Gameplay?

Rogue Agent was the first game I got my paws on after basking for a few days in the goodness that was Halo 2, but I tried not to let that affect my objectivity. With that being said, Goldeneye: Rogue Agent plays like just about every other FPS out there. You run, you shoot, and you kill bosses, and thanks to what must have been a mental lapse on the part of EA & Friends, you find yourself doing all of that running and killing much more than neccessary. If you wonder why, here's your answer: They forgot to give you the ability to save your game on demand. Rogue Agent works off that same "We'll save your game at the checkpoints that we put wherever we felt the urge to" theory that has plagued me through many games since I first picked up a Nintendo controller way back when. Suffice to say that it is more than frustrating. Either add more checkpoints, or add a save feature. Pretty novel concept, no? When I wasn't busy cursing at the fact I had to replay almost an entire level every time I died, I managed to find out the real reason why your character gets booted out of MI6 in the first place: He can't jump. How on earth do you create a supervillian and not give him the power to even hop over a desk? Controls were merely average as well, with the Rogue Agent responding rather sluggishly to my Controller S's input.

Well, at least it's not N64.

The graphics were simply nothing to write home about. I expected more out of a company who's had this much time to practice on the Xbox. The graphics weren't terrible, but they sure weren't what I've come to expect from something carrying EA's label.

The aural bright spot in total darkness

Luckily for EA, they at least managed to get the sound right. The assault rifle chatters nicely through my stereo system, and the grenades annoy my downstairs neighbors by rattling their ceiling. The voice talents are as good as ever, with Famke Janssen, and Christopher Lee lending their talent to the voices of Xenia Onatopp and Francisco Scaramanga respectively.

Un-fun Factor

Unfortunately, I found myself looking at Rogue Agent as a game I "had" to play merely to get the review up before the boss ripped my head from my shoulders. There just wasn't any "Wow, this is great, I've just got to keep playing 'til I beat it" factor there at all. Rather depressing when you think about it.

I've got your plasma right here....in grenade form.

As disappointed as I am with the game, I can't even muster a decent PlasmaFactor rating for it. Theres not much to be said past that.

The end.

If you're a Bond fan, and simply must have Goldeneye: Rogue Agent in your library, pick it up used. If you're a casual player, rent it, or go one better, and skip it completely for something more worth your time. Even if the Rogue Agent had his eye equipped with a million candlepower floodlight, he wouldn't find himself out of the darkness that is this game.